Chasms. I Understand Chasms.

The Journey (excerpt)

Lillian Smith

“Without words, it comes. And suddenly, sharply, one is aware of being separated from every person on one’s Earth and every object, and the the beginning of things and from the future and even a little, from one’s self. A moment before one was happily playing, the world was round and friendly. Now at one’s feet there are chasms that had been invisible until this moment. And one knows, and never remembers how it was learned, that there will always be chasms, and across chasms will always be those one loves.”

Most mornings now I wake to a call from the Home. My mother has fallen. Again.

Most nights, late when I can think and be in the late night move, I think of my father.

He is gone.

He is spared this Hell and for that I am grateful.

Most days I wander, literally and figuratively from one motion to another.

I move in Love and with Intention in caring for my son.

I move with fear and uncertainty in caring for my mother.

But I move.

I have been here before.

Chasms. I understand Chasms.

Grief. I understand Grief.

What I know of each is their individual nature and the folly of prediction.

“ And suddenly, sharply, one is aware of being separated from every person on one’s Earth and every object, and the beginning of things and from the future and even a little, from one’s self”

I understand this and stopped fighting it long ago.

Chasms.

I am on the edge.

Peace to you today where ever you may be; here or there on the edge of your own chasm.

Jen

~ by Step On a Crack on November 24, 2011.

3 Responses to “Chasms. I Understand Chasms.”

  1. i know that place. all those who l
    love you are there on the other side with their hands outstretched and hearts open when you are ready to connect. this too shall pass. Om Shantihi x

    Like

  2. Peace to you, Jen. May you find some form of ballast while you’re perched on the edge of the Chasm. The Big Book has always been a pretty Heavy book for me…

    Like

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