Child as Asteroid

I think of them now, supposing, wondering,

if indeed,

they are together in some slot of heaven or some other


  They belonged together no matter

the fighting and pulling apart.

They always came back;  two planets, one to the other.

 I thought on Sunday that perhaps it was like this:

The woman who became my mother fell in love

with a handsome, dangerous man her intellectual equal;

the only worry was the Child.

He may have been a handsome, dangerous man

With a daughter.

She bought the package because he was the prize.

I was a side note.

I imagine them, no, I remember them,

together in an orbit that did not include us.

Their world  theirs; and theirs alone.

We were distant asteroids,

devoid of light, circling,

circling their love.

When they were happy they were very happy;

when they were  angry,  it was passion incarnate.

I watched,

an asteroid,

the child in the bargain;

the child of the man my mother won.

I learned to be still and let it be;

to watch and to wait for the tides

of love and rage to run their course.

I can not imagine them not together.

And me?

I am here watching,

waiting for some  gravitational pull ,

an asteroid out of orbit.

 Peace,   Jen
The early days of my mothers alcoholics dementia
deal directly with the odd
love my parents had for one another.
Their  love was some weird glue
that held her in time as the dementia ran its course,
and threw her out of orbit…

~ by Step On a Crack on January 23, 2012.

12 Responses to “Child as Asteroid”

  1. Holy crap lady! This is amazing. Everything you write is visual. It has MOVEMENT! Man, i feel like i was just in space with Hal … remember Space ODD a- Sea. Odd being the amazing and volatile love of your parents. Sea being the other force in nature that pulled and pushed them to and from each other. And you and Andrea … Beautiful orbiters to become witness to the alcohol and dementia. BOOM.

    I thank God you and Andrea were brave enough to set foot in this world … my land and sea asteroid! 😉 love mel


  2. I agree with the earlier comment, “Everything you write is visual”. I love it!


  3. What an amazing piece! Applause and tears. How do you do that to us?



    Child, asteroid, Warrior, you’ve been nominated for the Blog for Mental Health 2012 Pledge. Here you go again. Get busy baby .. hook up to iamnotshe! K? love you m


  5. Dearest Jen,
    Sorry I am late, here. Been on vacation.
    This is superb.
    How can anything so sad be so beautiful?
    It’s your love that changes it all.
    Only through your eyes can we see what we do to those around us.
    Only one reading through your loving eyes makes us vow to do better.
    Thanks, Jen.


    • Dear Kathy

      Thank you for for

      so much I could not begin to put it into words. You are a Light in my Darkness; a Light home

      to my REAL Home.

      welcome home. I hope your vacation was exactly what you wished it would be…

      XO Jen


      • Thanks, Jen. Yes, I saw my sisters, both of whom have been through painful surgery, and one brother who has been through life-pain. All seemed greatly improved and even jovial. It was grand, around a big fat Italian dinner with my sibs, acting crazy like the old days. Our parents were pretty good parents, although bad spouses. How, I don’t know, but we are a strong bunch and we love a laugh, so . . .
        Thanks for the welcome. I know I can always find one here. 😉


  6. great post


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