“Found Letter” * BY Joshua Weiner

“Change is the only constant.”

My 8th grade science teacher, Mr. Klahr said.

At the time I loved the idea that ANYTHING could be counted on as constant.

Growing up with alcoholics in a violent neighborhood was totally unpredictable.

Any constancy was welcome;

even change.

*******************

I watch my son when he is not looking. I watch him hang with his friends. I watch him read.

I watch him comb his hair in mirror, so much more careful now than he was even 6 months ago.

I watch my friends kids grow and change.

I can hear my niece in England using her first words on the phone.

I talk with my niece and nephew on the phone and I can hear the change.

*********

“Change is the only Constant,” Mr. Klahr said.

At 12 years old, I believed him.

He was wrong.

Love is also constant.

*************

The kids are growing up.

Our 9 years at the same small school is coming to an end.

Preparations are being made for an 8th grade portfolio defense

and the graduation speech is being written.

Change is constant.

So is Love.

**************

My son is growing into manhood

and he is doing it with grace and  few bumps along the way.

He is a responsible young man.

He makes us laugh and makes us proud.

He is growing into manhood.

**************

Change and Love:

Constant.

I am feeling nostalgic and afraid.

I am afraid of the leave taking.

I am nostalgic for all the Laughter and tears that have brought us this far.

*************

As we near our next transition I am aware of

Love and its constancy.

The kids are Growing Up:

Change.

We will always Love them:

Constant.

Peace,   Jen

***************

Found Letter

BY JOSHUA WEINER

What makes for a happier life, Josh, comes to this:
Gifts freely given, that you never earned;
Open affection with your wife and kids;
Clear pipes in winter, in summer screens that fit;
Few days in court, with little consequence;
A quiet mind, a strong body, short hours
In the office; close friends who speak the truth;
Good food, cooked simply; a memory that’s rich
Enough to build the future with; a bed
In which to love, read, dream, and re-imagine love;
A warm, dry field for laying down in sleep,
And sleep to trim the long night coming;
Knowledge of who you are, the wish to be
None other; freedom to forget the time;
To know the soul exceeds where it’s confined
Yet does not seek the terms of its release,
Like a child’s kite catching at the wind
That flies because the hand holds tight the line.

Poem copyright © 2006 by Joshua Weiner. Reprinted from “From the Book of Giants,” University of Chicago Press, 2006

~ by Step On a Crack on April 29, 2012.

20 Responses to ““Found Letter” * BY Joshua Weiner”

  1. Oh that is beautiful 🙂

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  2. Precious and heartwarming.

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  3. Change is constant, so is love!
    I agree. Nice one!

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  4. Jen, this is all wonderful–heart-clutching. I remember well, what you wrote at the beginning–living in chaos and yearning for something to “stay the same, constant”. But it was not to be–and the awful thing is that some of us learn “chaos as lifestyle”; we create it, even as the dust is settling. Not anymore, though it took me a long time to learn new ways… I must say that I think you’re very brave, being a mom who loves so intensely–I chose not to be a mom, in part because I couldn’t have survived the natural and healthy leave-taking. Hope I haven’t taken up too much space here–emotional day. God bless you for all that you are–love, Caddo

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    • Dear Caddo,

      You could NEVER take up too much room! THAT is a scientific impossibility. Take my Word for it; the Word is from my heart

      YOU are a mystery to me in so many ways:
      HOW do you write SO beautifully ALL the time?
      What Love did you lose? so many questions….

      I almost chose to NOT be a mom too. I was so afraid that I would not know how to do it. I knew I did not want to repeat my moms ‘effort’. The leave taking: it happens all the time it seems. I think that God set it up for us in stages: Breast Feeding ends, they put on their own shoes, they go to pre school…..

      And one day, sooner than later, he will leave for Life: college or….. He will leave for good. God prepares us. I hate it. I guess we don’t always know what is good for us: God does. I need to trust that.

      I am sorry you are having an emotional day. I hope there is some UP to this day for you my Friend.

      God Bless you too my Amazing Poet Heart Friend….

      XO Jen

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  5. No need to be sorry for emotional days–they are what spawn poetry! I agree with your reply, “change happens in stages” and God is in the changes–nonetheless, I say that being a loving mom is courageous, and I salute you most sincerely.

    You are not the first considerate and “thinking” person to mention my mysterious quality here–perhaps if the blog endures, the veil will gradually slip from the enigma….

    I do love our bits of sharing–you are quite inspiring, Jen. Caddo

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  6. Beautiful

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  7. Jen –
    I literally started grieving the summer before my daughter started high school and then my son two years later.
    All through our late night talks and the theater productions and speech and music competitions and boyfriends and girlfriend – there would be a tiny part of me that was wrestling to hold on to them.
    This fall they’ll turn 30 and 32.
    And no, it was never exactly the same after they left home. But they’re amazing individuals and not only am I richer for knowing them, but so is everyone they touch with their tender hearts.
    You are such an awesome Mom.
    You’ve redefined the role and you’ve done it with such grace and aplomb.
    These next four years will occasionally creep but mostly fly and you’ll know how to help your son soar, because you’ve learned to sail yourself.
    much love to you,
    Debbie

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  8. Jen– I love independence and I raised a son who required a new shot of it every week, or he started to languish. Watching my son grow up was so scary. I knew he’d do somehting great… I just prayed it would be legal.

    So, yes it’s frightening to see them become men. I agree with Debbie that you are helping him soar because you have learned the secrets for take-offs and landings. You’ve given him your maps, your destinations, your journey journals. He is indeed fortuante. Enjoy the ride, Jen. It’s OK to be excited, scared and a little proud!

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  9. I absolutely love this Jen. I love the poem, but i love that you shared about Will and J … about your family, growth, love, change, tears and laughter. It is all SO WORTH it! My God, would or could i ever have imagined you, my Cool, Sweet friend a mom in love and surrounded by love. Really living life! High Five, Loving one!!!

    I know it is scary to think about Will as a nice, grown-up man, but you are his first love, and that’s a fact. Love is constant as you said.

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  10. […] Change is the Only Constant […]

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